Cody and Danielle
There are two issues I see with Cody and Danielle. The first one has been front and center all season...Danielle is not physically attracted to Cody. Can attraction grow over time? Absolutely! In fact, the foundation of a lasting relationship is a strong friendship. However, the constant pressure on Danielle is not helping her to get there. It's pushing her further away. Which leads me to the second issue...trust.
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| Photo credit: Kinetic Content |
Cody and Danielle define trust very differently. Trust to Cody is physical intimacy. His walls are up and he isn't willing to let Danielle in because he's afraid to get hurt. I get that. When you feel rejection, and for him it's physical, you start to pull away.
Danielle defines trust as commitment to the marriage and an effort to try to grow in love. She is giving this her all, but the bottom line is, she can't force it in just eight weeks. The big question is, will Cody be willing to give it more time or will his patience run out?
Nate and Sheila
It has certainly been a wild ride for Nate and Sheila. Learning how to communicate through disagreements is a challenge for any marriage. Fighting fair is a skill that takes concerted effort and time to master.
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| Photo credit: Kinetic Content |
Another thing that can cause a huge disconnect is differences in processing time. Nate is able to get over things right away. Sheila needs time to process and cool down. Pushing her to resolution before she's ready will only cause things to escalate again. Yes, I can relate.
Although they've have had some extreme highs and lows, the one thing that has remained constant is their ability to forgive. If you have forgiveness for one another, there isn't any problem you can't overcome.
Anthony and Ashley
I truly believe Anthony and Ashley love each other, but they speak different love language. Acts of Service is his language of love, preferring to show his affection by actions and deeds. Anthony is a pleaser and avoids conflict at any cost. I understand this because I am married to an Anthony.
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| Photo credit: Kinetic Content |
Ashley's love language is words of confirmation. Although Anthony is showing her every day with the meals he makes, romantic gestures and gifts he gives, she is longing to hear the words, "I love you".
The key is finding a balance between showing love to your partner the way they need it, in addition to the way that feels natural to you. Anthony needs to say words of confirmation along with his little acts of kindness. Ashley needs to do little things that make Anthony happy in addition to saying words of affirmation.
Next week we will find out whether these couples chose to stay married or get a divorce. What are your predictions?
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Trust according to the Experts
Building a Strong Foundation
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