Saturday, May 20, 2017

Married at First Sight ~ Words are Empty Vessels Without Empathy

This week on Married at First Sight, the honeymoon's are over and it's time for real life to begin. 

The episode started with an intense discussion between Nate and Sheila. When Sheila reached her limit and was ready to shut down, Nate calmly approached her to apologize and ask what he could do to make it right. In an emotional scene that rocked viewers to the core, Sheila pleaded with him to not only hear the words she was saying, but to feel them. This hit me so profoundly, I knew I had to take a deeper look at it. What is it that gives us the ability to feel someone's pain and joy?

Photo credit: Kinetic Content
Words are empty vessels until they are felt. That's why it's so important to carefully measure their intent before they are spoken. So how can we ensure our words have the desired impact? One way is listening and speaking with empathy. 

Empathy is:
seeing with the eyes of another
listening with the ears of another &
 feeling with the heart of another.

When you have empathy, you can put yourself in another person's shoes and see things from their perspective. You not only hear the words, but you feel the emotion in them.

Photo credit: Kinetic Content
Anthony and Ashley have shown a willingness to look at things from their spouse's point of view. One example is when they made the decision to move to a place with parking for Ashley. Although Anthony didn't initially understand her need, he listened to Ashley's reasons with an open mind. Realizing her safety was at risk, Anthony was able to reevaluate and alter his thinking. 
Non-verbals are also a part of empathy. Cody and Danielle are clearly awkward and uncomfortable in their current situation. Despite that fact, you can clearly see care and concern in their eyes.

Photo credit: Kinetic Content

I love the talk they had on the swing. Cody opened up about what he was feeling, Danielle validated his thoughts and then shared how she felt. Even though they are having a rough patch, they still seem to be committed to making their marriage work. 

All three couples are doing a great job of communicating and listening with empathy. I don't know what it feels like to get married at first sight, but each week as I watch, I will imagine what it feels like to walk in their shoes. 


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